English: Anything MISSING?

‘Jesus loves you!’ Well, you heard it too often, and you know it well that you haven’t really felt this so called ‘love’ anytime in your life .You’re just sick and tired to hear about this kind of stuffs anyway .You told yourself you don’t have time.

And then, you thought, every time you face trouble, it seems as if there’s no answer even if you pray so hard, at least, that’s as far as you can think. Your prayers are often left unanswered. No, not just often, but always! Those prayers you made about someone you like from your class, that you’d be liked back. Those long winded prayers you made before your exams. Those many blessings you asked, but never received. What could be missing in your prayers? You wonder what is the thing you might be needing in your life! When you look at your friends who seem to be very spiritual, sometimes you want to be like them. But you never got that touch, which you expect, that could change your life, too. Then you thought, after all, they too fail many times in their lives. And it seems as if they’re just pretending their joy, faking a smile on their face, though there were some hurts in them always. You call them foolish, coz they seem to live in a world of dreams, not facing reality and yet pulled by the forces of this world. They seem to hope for something that’s beyond this world and you can’t imagine a thing about that! As for you, your policy is to better join the other side, that is, if you can’t beat them! Then you even started doubting if you really believe in what they preached, and the smiles they gave when they got hurt. You cried out to God why, but He is silent.

You look at some other friends who also seem to be on the right track. They go to Church, they sing, they preach. But you see no good things coming out of their lives. They seem as if they would do anything the world allows them to do, no restrictions to their lifestyle as long as the Pastors and elders are not around .In short, they could join the world as well as live a goodie goodie life when its needed. You can’t stand these kinds, they’re just too artificial. You hate them, and even dislike being their friend, coz you know they never practice what they teach! They seem to see a lot of fault in others, but never remember to think of who they are. You wonder if they really knew themselves at all! You asked God to punish them. But they seem to grow in number each day.

To make things better, you thought to yourself, when you turn to the big preachers, those who could heal, do anointing, speak in tongues, which you couldn’t even understand a word!! Those who stretched out their ministries everywhere around the world. You see their magazines, their teachings, their booklets. You noticed their encouragement on givings , offerings, those ads on their books, cds, cassettes, etc. They’re too much into business, you thought. And when you see them on TVs, you’re like wow..!!stunned!..they look too rich, too fancy. It seems they become richer day by day, but with what?(the blessings or whatever) What they received from their so called partners and friends who bought their cds, cassettes, books from them, whom they promised good life. “Okay”, you said to yourself, “not bad. After all, they mean no harm.” But what makes you doubt is whether they really do everything for their God, or they’re just, you know, doing business? Well, you never know the answer, coz you haven’t met them face to face. And you’re sure you’ll never like to meet them anyway. Then you shout, “O God, why are they deceiving so many people.” But your God is still very silent, as silent as a stone. All you could hear is your own echo that repeats exactly what you’ve said.And then, you finally look at your friends of other beliefs. Some, who have their own gods, and some who didn’t even have any gods, and even some, whose religion is themselves. But you know that most of them are not so religious like your other friends. To your surprise, they’re successful. They look content and wealthy with no restrictions in their lives to use their cleverness in the world. They don’t have time to think about praying and all those stuffs, but they never seem to lack anything in life. They really worked hard, and strived hard to reach whatever goals they have. And they could do anything to reach that goal and would try any means to become successful. They never mind to lie a little, bribe a little, or cheat a little. After all, everybody does that, and without those ingredients, there’s no surviving in this crooked world. And they’re too skillful you just admire the way they can handle things very neat and clean. And above all that, they’re respected in the society, maybe not because of who they are, but because of what they are. They attained the highest position in any administrations. The more clever they are, the more successful!

Now, you looked at your own self . You realize that you’re nowhere! You’re neither with the world, but you’re neither holy. Sometimes you thought you’d live in both ways, but you ain’t got any satisfaction or peace in any ways. You’re left with no hope, so you decided to live according to your own ways. After all, you’re in the world, and your God would never answer a prayer from a sinner like you, you mumbled to yourself. And its not so tough to join the world, everything is so…good and nice. People are nice, you can spend the seven days in the week equally, no need to remind yourself if its Sunday, or whether you’ll have to pray before eating, or sleeping, or any of the rituals you’d have done as a formality if you were trying to act holy. You just tried your best to become successful. You started working so hard you hardly have the time to rest your mind. Then, as the saying goes, there’s always a success after every hard work, you sure became successful. You became the person you’ve been dreaming of becoming. You’re rich, you’re wealthy, and you’re popular in the society. And you got the respect you want from others, only you didn’t know if they really respect you from the heart. But it doesn’t matter. It’s the world, and it’s just normal to be known, and you don’t need to know what people talked behind your back. “We are all same, it’s my life. They have their own business, I have my own business,” is what you always told yourself.

But after all these, after having everything you want, you still need something more. You never really get satisfied as you thought you would be. There seems to be a hole in your heart which drains all your emotions and feelings. You know you never have that peace in your heart, but you won’t tell that to yourself, coz you don’t want to be someone with everything, but lacking some stupid word like ‘peace’. So you tried all that you can get to make you feel good, but they flew away so soon, you can’t say that they are peace. You have everything they called ‘moments pleasure’, ‘happiness’, ‘merry making’. But they are not ‘peace’, rather, they gave you fear. They all seemed to be drained into that hole in your hear.

Then for the first time in a very long time, you feel that longing in your heart, but you don’t know what that is. You asked yourself if there’s anything missing in your life. And you know it’s ‘peace’, you have to admit that it was ‘peace’ after all. And you’re sure you don’t have eternal life, too. You started remembering what you used to say about your old friends who hope for something which seems impossible, you compare yourself with them. Though they seem to be like you who longed for something, there’s something which is so different about their hope and yours. Coz they have that peace besides their hope. And what they hope is not of this world, but something beyond, that life eternal. As for you, that is what you never had. You started remembering your good ol’ days, the Church you used to attend, you could still count the number of times you went. You longed to go back, and be happy like those days. And even though you never really have that touch you expected, you could still feel that something which was different every time you enter that Church. You knew you want to go back, but that’s next to impossible, for you’ve already gone far away. Now, you’re just an old useless person!!

You fall to your knees and cried.

“Rejoice, O young man, in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth; walk in the ways of your heart, and in the sight of your eyes; but know that for all these GOD will bring you into judgment.” - Ecclesiastes 11: 9

“Fear GOD and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.” - Ecclesiastes 12: 13

My dear friend, nobody and nothing in this world is going to give us lasting peace in this very world and eternal life after this world. There is only one choice, which you know it well, ‘to follow JESUS, who loves you to death’. Its still true that JESUS loves you, and will ever be true. There’s no turning back in His love.

And there’s one thing that’s always the same, that His arms are open anytime, anywhere, for anyone. All it needs is for you to make your move. You take one step, He’ll take hundred steps for you. He wants to take care of you.

“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” - Hebrew 13: 5

“Behold, now is the accepted time, behold, now is the day of salvation.” - 2Corinthians 6: 2.

May you find rest in His arms!

[This article is written by a very good friend of mine- DR.EVELYN PACHUAU - Samuel Lalrozama Hmar]